When will running feel better?
Patience is not my strong suit. It’s not even a suit I keep in my closet. This trait, currently, is ever present as I try to navigate myself back to a regular fitness routine, one that I wish would just feel normal and fall into the regular patterns of prior: completing satisfying workouts, seeing progress, and most of all, having excitement for the next day’s session.
Rather, I’m down in a bit of a pit. Nearly 12 minute miles take as much effort as 10-something paces did before. I don’t even consider trying speedwork; I sense my heartrate will be off the charts if I even hit a mid-8 range. I wake up and groan at the idea of working out; starting is harder and harder, with the sense of dejection and pre-defeat lingering into the warmup walk down the driveway.
What does one do when the motivation takes a nosedive and the discipline feels on the cusp of fading?
I don’t have the answer to that one. I’ve maintained my routine for now: get up, lace the shoes, put in the miles, lift the weights. I was supposed to race this coming weekend but I threw that idea in the garbage – I’m not ready to drive by the accident site, and thus the journey 45 minutes away on an early Saturday morning isn’t worth it to me anyway since my training has gone to shit. It’s unlikely I’ll partake in my August race either.
So what does feel good? Thankfully, a few things.
My afternoon swims are still a part of my day when I can squeeze them in. Sometimes Little Miss Ba sets up her umbrella on my lounge chair and relaxes while I stroke in the water, and we hang out a little while after as I dry off and read whatever book I’ve chosen for the day. The sun is brutal and the pool not especially cool, but still, outside time does wonders for my mentality.
Coffee dates always bring me up from a funk – except now I might have to be a midday decaf-er due to my new mediation. Shameful. We dropped by Willa’s on Thursday for their seasonal almond joy latte, and it was absolutely bomb.
Good meals are essential to my wellbeing. This week I cooked up a chimichurri veggie and chicken sausage skillet, my go-to Broccoli Bacon Caesar Pasta Salad, and enjoyed a brownie a la mode after work on Sunday. I’ve loved my recipe development lately but the casual eats on non-photography days are just as worthwhile.
On July 4th (oh yeah, that was this past weekend. I kinda forgot already) we grilled some fish sandwiches and enjoyed them on the pool deck. Later in the evening we lit some sparklers and danced around the street – it was a nice festive touch for someone who doesn’t love fireworks and is in bed trying to snooze by the time the shows start anyway.
It’s not all woeful currently. I’m adjusting to normalcy still, and I know in my heart of hearts that my body needs time to recapture its former sparkle. Healing is almost never a linear process, particularly with trauma; I’ll have good, happy, regular days, and days when the flashbacks are intense and I need comfort and assurance that I’m safe and cared for.
This knowledge doesn’t ease the sadness of losing my running prowess. I will get frustrated, and it will feel like an endless loop of failure on certain days. But others, I can just let it be and partake in those aforementioned joys, and maybe have a lighter mindset. Those days are important.
Just a little rumination for today. I guess I’m doing the best I can, and you are, too.
Be well, friends.
The Fuck We Cooking This Week?
…Trying that apple pie again!
…A unique savory one-pan meal for National Blueberry Day.
…A homemade electrolyte beverage!
…A fun White Russian!
A Few Things I’m Digging
Tomato sandwiches…Never knew what the hype was around this mayo-tomato combo but WOW is it good. I like to add some fresh basil and usually pair with chips and some kind of cold cut. Heirloom tomatoes are king here!
Biofreeze…I tweaked my whiplash injury this week and basically doused my neck and shoulder with this stuff. It’s a mentholated pain reliever and it felt SO good, especially since the cooling effect kinda helped me not overheat on my runs.
Pizza…I had the BIGGEST craving for pizza on Friday so I tried Digiorno’s Wood-Fired Supreme pizza. I was impressed! Digiorno is kind of a childhood nostalgia treat for me and this one was actually a lot tastier than I was expecting.
Notable Food Holidays
Tuesday, July 7: Chocolate Day (let’s do some in-season baking with Double Chocolate Zucchini Bread!)
Wednesday, July 8: National Blueberry Day (Blueberry Lemon Layer Cake sounds perfect!)
Friday, July 10: National French Fries Day (crispy fries and BLT Caesar Pasta Salad for the ultimate *girl dinner*.)
Saturday, July 11: National Blueberry Muffin Day (lo and behold, Bakery Style Blueberry Muffins coming atcha!)
This Week’s Menu
Meatless Monday…Marinated Tomato Caprese Salad with Creamy Garlic Dressing
Taco (Bowl) Tuesday…Crispy Baja Fish Taco Bowls with Chipotle Mayo
Wednesday…4 Cheese Peach Garlic Butter Pizza
Thursday…Pineapple Maple Chipotle Shrimp Skewers with Jalapeño Ranch
Friday Patio Hour…Peach Beach Punch
Saturday Baking…No Bake Peanut Butter Bourbon Truffle Pie
Poolside Sunday…Grilled Chile Lime Mahi Burgers with Garlic Sauce
Summer Style Finds
Tops
Bottoms
Shoes & Bags
Five Fresh Caprese Recipes
3. Hot Honey Caprese Whipped Ricotta
4. Pull-Apart Peach Caprese Garlic Bread
5. Grilled White Wine Caprese Avocado Sandwich
Week in Training
Monday, 6.29: 6.5 miles, 12:00 pace + 28 minute legs
Hot, blah.
Strength:
- 3 x 12 narrow squat 60#
- 4 x 10 ea. calf press 110#
- 3 x 15 sumo squat 50#
- 3 x 8 ea. leg extension 50#
- 2 x 10/1 x 8 front raise 30#
- 3 x 8 ea. sit squat
- 3 x 12 superman 10#
- :60 plank
Tuesday, 6.30: 50 minute elliptical + 21 minute back & bis
Decent spin, not much to report.
Strength:
- 3 x 8 biceps curl 20#
- 3 x 12 mid row 50#
- 3 x 6 hammer curl 20#
- 4 x 8 face pull 37#
- 2 x 15 ea. banded standing hydrant
- 2 x 15 ea. lunge matrix
- 50 crunches
Wednesday, 7.1: 6.5 miles, 11:53 pace + 24 minute legs
Strength:
- 3 x 14 walking lunge 30#
- 3 x 10 calf press 170#
- 1 x 8/2 x 10 hamstring curl 40/30# (why are these so hard?!)
- 3 x 10 ea. single leg deadlift 40#
- 2 x 12 ea. split squat 15#
- 3 x 15 stir the pot
Thursday, 7.2: 65 minute elliptical + 25 minute chest & tris
Did a workout today and it felt SO nice to have some structure! Plus, I didn’t feel like it was a struggle which is very encouraging. 20 minute warmup, then 8 x 3 minutes at tempo effort (level 5) with 1 minute recovery at level 2, 15 minute cooldown. Not too strenuous but I certainly broke a sweat.
Strength:
- 3 x 10 shoulder press 20#
- 3 x 8 triceps pressdown 32#
- 3 x 12 Svend press 15#
- 3 x 8 triceps extension 30#
- 3 x 6/1 x 10 incline chest press 25/20#
- 3 x 10 ea. banded side and back leg raises
- 2 x 20 banded hamstring frogs
- :60 plank
Friday, 7.3: 4.5 miles, 11:43 pace + 17 minute mobility
The mobility routine felt so nice after the run. As far as the run goes, I think I might have perceived a slight improvement. The new Kinvaras might’ve helped that.
Saturday, 7.4: 9.35 miles, 11:51 pace *Happy 4th!*
Sunday, 7.5: 25 minute elliptical
Total running mileage: 26.8
